From Too Many Chefs -

September 21, 2005
The case of the ice cream cat burglar

Found on OhGizmo!

A spotlight scans an expanse of wall. On a window ledge, just outside the beam, a slim man dressed entirely in back flattens himself.

The beam passes and the man edges out on the ledge until he reaches a window. He takes a glass cutter and carefully slices a fist sized circle out of the glass. He reaches in carefully and undoes the window latch.

The man steps through the window. He is in a dark kitchen. He scans the room - no one there. He walks quietly, carefully across the floor to the refrigerator. He open the freezer door and reaches in to extract the reason he's here - a pint of New York Super Fudge Chunk. He pulls at the lid - it won't budge! He looks down at the pint and sees his defeat - a Euphoria pint lock. He pulls and pulls but it's no use - the lid won't budge.

If you're sick of your roomies finishing off your pints of Haagen Dazs or Ben and Jerry's, this device is extremely useful. Place your pint in the lock, set the combo, lock it up, and no one will be able to get into your pint of Cherry Garcia. Your ice cream is safe.

Obviously, a wanton vandal could chop their way in through the bottom of the pint, but previously suspected but undetected thievery of your frozen custard prodcuts will cease. Right on the side of the lock, it even says, "I'm terribly sorry, but there is no 'u' in 'my pint'."

Now why might this actually be useless? Well, I can think of two situations when it won't do you a bit of good. First - as mentioned above - when your ice cream thief doesn't care about leaving evidence behind, this little plastic gizmo will do you no good. And the second circumstance that renders this a useless gadget?

If you're the type who thinks the pints are single serving sizes then clearly this product won't benefit you. But then, you probably aren't giving your roomates and family a chance at that ice cream anyway, right?

The slim burglar in black skulks out of the room, foiled. He heads to a 7-11 and buys his own damn pint of ice cream. All is well in the city.
Posted by Barrett in Maryland at September 21, 2005 7:17 AM | TrackBack

I'd just cut a covert flap in the bottom, and eat my way up.

And a big tip o' the hat to Cherry Garcia. Good stuff, methinks.

Posted by the pragmatic chef™ on September 21, 2005 at 11:56 AM


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Posted by Meenakshi on September 21, 2005 at 12:08 PM

How does the sneak thief stay so thin?? ; )

Posted by Meg in Paris on September 22, 2005 at 7:54 AM

Sneaking and clambering burns calories, Meg.

Posted by Barbara on September 23, 2005 at 10:30 AM