(Or Why Beans on Toast Are Actually More Difficult Than You Might Think)
I am sure every proud cook out there has had a similar moment at some point. You spend hours planning meals and coming up with new exciting dishes. You anxiously watch your Critics as they plough in, eyes fixed on the TV. And, occasionally, when you ask them what they want for dinner, they answer with something really difficult, like...beans on toast.
My Critic wants beans on toast, he gets beans on toast. (Brain the size of a planet...) The really sad thing is that I got them wrong the first time around. Now THAT'S seriously incompetent. But I was distracted and working on some real food for the Is My Blog Burning? entry and so it goes. The next night I made them again (at his request - when you get an itch for comfort food it stays until you scratch it the right way) and all was well.
Beans on Toast for One Brit
1 can Heinz beans (Marks & Spensers are acceptable but not preferred. The US kind of pork and beans are not acceptable, even if they are made by Heinz.)
2 slices of bread (I make them brown bread in the vague hope of rendering it slightly healthy)
butter (forgot we were out of butter the first time around)
a handful of grated sharp cheddar cheese
Heat your beans over a low heat. Do not forget them while you are spreading and chopping for a completely different meal, as they will stick to the bottom of the pan and get mushy and generally look less nice. In the meantime, put your bread in the toaster. Do not burn toast. Butter the toast liberally (apparently this is essential). Spread the hot beans over the toast and top with the cheese. Do not put the dish in the oven in the mistaken idea that the cheese needs to melt more, as I once did in the early days before I was Enlightened: serve immediately.